What I learned from carrying out an interview of a female and the interview of a male trying to dig into this intriguing subject was that using the Internet for dating is equally painful for men and for women, but for very different reasons.
That was one of the main reasons I called it quits.
It made me SO uncomfortable that guys so much older than me, older than most of my siblings (all of which are 8 years plus older than me), were sending me messages telling me that I was “hot”.
I saw that some of your interests were the same as mine,” or something along those lines.
Also, some of the messages I got were from a few guys that ranged from early 40’s to late 40’s and I was maybe 19 at the time.
To get some insight into what women go through on these dating websites, I pulled aside one of my family members who I knew had spent some time on these sites looking for her future spouse.
By the time of this interview, she had already given up and moved on, finally discovering her future husband while visiting old friends at her alma mater. Ryan (RD): What year did you sign up with an online dating website and how long did you keep your account? RD: What were the majority of messages that you received from guys like? I got some commenting on my picture telling me how “hot” I was…how “good” I looked.
The problem with online dating is that you can’t see the person’s face when they’re telling you about themselves. I think it’s hard for guys to comprehend the world of online dating from a woman’s perspective. They then flippantly toss out all of those well thought out, carefully crafted messages from most of those poor schmucks, and then they log onto their Facebook accounts to complain to their girlfriends that there are no “good men” left in the world.
You can’t watch as they smile, and that smile spreads up into their eyes and transforms their face into one of the most beautiful things you’ve ever seen – a thing that warms your heart and makes you realize you want to spend more time with the person. Unfortunately, the reality is nowhere near that fantasy.
I am getting terribly uncomfortable just thinking about it.